Tiger Woods has committed to play the Masters, April 5 – 11. It promises to be one of the biggest “debuts” ever in sports.
And that’s what you’ve been waiting for, isn’t it? Tiger to start playing again? I mean, you never really cared about how the SUV caromed off the fire hydrant and ended up in the trees (an unplayable lie). You were never concerned about how many hot women he slept with. (After all, he wasn’t doing anything that any other guy who’s the most famous athlete in the world, owner of a 157-foot yacht, with a strong competitive nature, the adulation of millions, a thing for blondes, and the nickname “Tiger” wouldn’t do.) You didn’t put much stock in the trip to Mississippi for rehab (for a “condition” shared by 94% of the world’s human males). No, what you cared about was the golf, the chance to see the second-best player in history do what he does best (or maybe the thing he does second best). Anybody can have sex; not anybody can win 14 majors.
So, you’re about to get your wish. And Tiger’s competitive debut as an officially-designated sleazebag figures to be one of the hottest tickets and most intensely followed sporting events of the decade. We love our golf.
So, for those of you who wouldn’t miss this venerable, intensely-competitive golf tournament for anything — for those who want to enjoy the azaleas in bloom around the par-3 12th hole and the serene atmosphere of Augusta National being shattered by scrambling hordes of photographers and legions of babbling, celeb-trashing reporters — then you can get your tickets right here.
Acquire your tickets from TicketNetwork and, when you spend $250 or more now, you’ll receive $20 off your next order over $250. After the tournament, come back and leave a comment here about you experience.
And, by the way, if Tiger wins, he will have to be recognized as being the most strong-minded person since Rasputin. He will be Howard Roark. He will be Michael Jackson — if, you know, Michael had turned out sane and healthy.
You can get your balls here…
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